False Alarm

This morning I woke up feeling terrible. Swine flu. It has to be. The sweats, nausea, headache, blurry vision. I knew it! I knew public transportation would be the, if not death, decapacitation of me. Ugh why do I have to be sick on a busy week like this! Hmm. This has been a busy week. Last night was Trivia Night, so that must make this Thursday morning. Trivia Night. Nausea. Sweats. Huh. False alarm. Not, in fact Swine Flu, but hangover.


I am one, classy broad.

In case of emergency

Our building handed out "Go" bags.  In the case of terror attack, natural disaster, or an Oprah-induced rampage, we are to take these bags with us to help us get to safety.  The contents are as follows:
1 garbage bag
1 painters mask
1 map of downtown Chicago printed 5 years ago
2 small bandaids that I've already used thanks to uncomfy shoes

Really?